Zaterdag 2 Mei.

Ik was blij dat ik gister weer kon gaan werken, even weg van thuis. Dat hij er spijt van heeft heb ik wel tig keer gehoord. Het begon al de volgende ochtend, ik had slecht geslapen en voelde me geradbraakt toen ik wakker werd. Ik wilde me omdraaien toen ik merkte dat hij niet naast me lag, dus stond ik op en liep naar beneden. Halverwege de trap rook ik koffie. Ik dacht nog even dat ik het me verbeelde, maar dat was niet zo. Wim zat in de keuken, hij was aangekleed, had koffie gezet en lachte vriendelijk. Ik zag meteen dat hij nerveus was. ‘Ga maar zitten, ik schenk de koffie wel in.’

Dus ben ik gaan zitten en wachtte op wat komen ging. Nadat hij de koffie voor me neer had gezet ging hij tegenover me zitten.

Ik zei niks, geen woord, maar denken deed ik des temeer.

‘Weet je,’ begon hij even later, ‘ik kan je niet vertellen hoe zeer het me spijt, maar terugdraaien kan ik het niet meer. Ik hoop echt dat je niet bij me weggaat en wil er alles aan doen om het goed te maken.’

‘Dan begin maar met werk te zoeken,’ snauwde ik. ‘Je hebt schulden en die moeten afbetaald worden.’ Ik had er nog bij willen zeggen dat ik hem een lul vond omdat hij me zwaar besodemietert had, maar dat zei ik niet.

‘Ik ga volgende week naar een uitzendbureau en laat me inschrijven, ik zal alles aanpakken, écht waar ik beloof het. Ik wil alles doen om het goed te maken.’

Ik knikte maar wat en dat zat hem niet lekker. Hij pakte mijn hand vast en zei: ‘Geef me een kans, ik wil er alles aan doen, als je maar bij me  blijft.’ Hij zat er zo zielig bij dat ik niet langer boos kon blijven. ‘Ik geef je een kans, maar beloof me een ding, doe dat nooit meer. Als ik er achter kom dat je toch weer gaat gokken is het over, dan vertrek ik.’

Hij zat bijna te huilen en zei voor de zoveelste keer dat hij er spijt van had.

Even later stond hij van tafel op en ging achter de computer zitten. En ik moet zeggen hij doet echt zijn best.  Hij kan waarschijnlijk  kranten en reclamefolders gaan bezorgen, dus dat is in elk geval iets. Voor de rest loopt hij zich behoorlijk uit te sloven, hij doet ineens van alles in huis. Gisteren is hij aan de tuin begonnen en het ziet er best goed uit.

Maar ik was wel blij dat ik weg kon. Hoewel daar maakte ik ook weer iets mee. Ik zat net toen er een oude vrouw naar binnen kwam, ik schatte haar ergens in de tachtig. Ze lachte vriendelijk en ging bij mij aan tafel zitten. Ik keek verbaasd en vroeg of er iets aan de hand was. Ze schudde haar hoofd en zei: ‘Nee, maar ik was aan de wandel en toen dacht ik ga maar ergens een kopje koffie drinken, gewoon voor de gezelligheid. U moet namelijk weten dat ik alleen woon en dus niemand heb om mee te praten, daarom ben ik hier. Ik voel me vaak erg eenzaam.’ Ik knikte maar wat, had ook niet veel zin om erop in te gaan, mijn hoofd stond er niet naar. Maar dat had ze niet in de gaten, want ze ging vrolijk verder. ‘Vindt u het goed dat ik hier zit? U zit hier ook maar alleen.’

Ja, wat wilde ik, het liefst had ik haar weggestuurd, maar dat vond ik weer zielig, dus heb ik haar laten zitten en naar alle verhalen geluisterd die ze vertelde. Over haar overleden man, haar kinderen die ergens anders wonen en nog veel meer. Gelukkig hoefde ik niet veel te zeggen, dus dat scheelde weer. Ze bleef best lang zitten en toen ze uitgekakeld was zei ze dat ze het fijn had gevonden. ‘Weet u,’ zei ze,  ‘ik ben blij dat ik u heb leren kennen, het doet me goed en ik kom vast gauw terug.’ Zielig hoor zo’n oud eenzaam vrouwtje.

 

 

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787 antwoorden op “Zaterdag 2 Mei.”

  1. Ik hoop voor margriet dat wim snel een baantje vind, dan kan hij zijn schuld af betalen. Ja moet er niet aan denken dat mijn man gaat gokken….. jeetje wat een boel eenzame mensen zijn er toch, zielig hoor.

  2. Ik vind het mooi van Margriet dat ze hem een tweede kans geeft. Hopen dat hij snel werk vindt. En nu nog het vertrouwen terug krijgen…………..er is niets zo triest als eenzame mensen,oude of jongere. Dat maakt niks uit

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